Happy 4th of July to all who celebrated last week!
As most of you know, a recurring topic in my weekly blog posts is the absolute necessity of cultivating a “balanced perspective” (the second of my four principles of values-based leadership). This requires you to take the time to understand multiple perspectives, even in (perhaps, especially in) cases where you may have a deeply-held belief and may strongly disagree with any contradictory perspectives.
To help maintain my own sense of balance, on a daily basis I try to recall the words of Saint Francis: “I seek to understand before I am understood.”
Many of us have strong opinions and perspectives on different topics, but do we take the time to understand why others have different opinions and perspectives? I am often reminded of a quote from my grandfather, Farrell Grehan, who used to tell me when I was a young boy, “Harry, life is much simpler when you only understand your side of the story.”
I cannot think of an area that warrants a balanced perspective more than our current, intensely polarized political environment. Of course, this has been ongoing for some time now, but here in the US given that this year is an election year, we’re certainly seeing a ramp up.
Here are just a few examples:
- Some believe (beyond a shadow of a doubt) that Trump will do a great job as a second term president.
- Others believe Trump being reelected will be a disaster for American democracy (no ifs or buts about it).
- Some believe that Biden being reelected is the best alternative for the country in the current environment (it’s an open and shut case).
- Others believe (with 100% certainty) that given Biden’s age and health issues, he should withdraw from the 2024 election. Some even believe that Biden is incapable of finishing out his current term, and the 25th amendment should be used to remove him from office immediately.
Whatever your opinion or perspective is on this topic, and no matter how strongly you may adhere to that perspective, my request is that you take the time to understand why other people may have a different opinion or perspective.
I know it usually isn’t easy, especially when it comes to the more emotionally-charged topics; just think of the number of times somebody in a discussion with you has said: “I don’t understand where you’re coming from.” It took me a while to realize that when people say this, they usually haven’t even attempted to understand your view; they are stuck to their point of view, and they disagree with anything that even appears to contradict it. As I’ve shared before, my approach to such situations is to pause, and then quietly – politely – ask: “Joe/Jane, would you like to understand? Because if you would like to understand, I’m happy to explain my opinion and perspective to you, and then you can decide whether you agree or disagree.”
What I try to teach my Kellogg students is that it is fine and good to have your own strong opinion, but you should definitely take the time to understand the opinions and perspectives of others, and then decide whether you agree or disagree. I have come to believe that saying “I don’t understand” is actually ignorant. If I take the time to understand, only then can I make an informed decision.
I truly believe that developing a “balanced perspective” is a true hallmark of a values-based leader, and it is clear to me that we need more values-based leaders in the world we’re living in today. 👍😁🙏
More later because this is very challenging and it seems that with regard to major political issues there is usually little interest in understanding because positions have been hardened over time. Maybe the the best outcome it to get a clear recognition of the differences. Agreement too. If done at the level of philosophy progress can be made; not so easy at the rough and tumble base level of politics.